Broken Oven + Pi Day = No-Bake Chocolate-Raspberry Cream Pie.

Okay! So! I was going through some things today and stumbled across this post and thought....well. I could blog again.

And since this was all queued up and ready to go......

A pie recipe from a few years ago! (any pictures would surely have been in whatever computer I was using at that time, but as I don't even live in the same country anymore, they are lost.

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Look, as far as I'm concerned, Pi Day (March 14, 'cause 3.14, get it?) is a delicious and fantastic holiday. I also am not pleased with my malfunctioning oven. It doesn't really do things like "hold heat" or anything, although it does broil, which is better than nothing. I've made shortbread cookies with that broiler.

I would do fantastically at one of those weird Top Chef challenges where they make you do things in a Target store or in a foil pit or something. But this isn't about my excellent and useful skill set, this is about pie.

I wanted to celebrate Pi Day. I wanted pie. I like pie. So I poked around on-line and, on the Bon Appetit website, I found exactly the recipe I wanted.

No Bake Chocolate-Raspberry Cream Pie. It was easy! In fact, the hardest part was finding the creme fraiche at the grocery store. Also, in finding chocolate wafers that are corn-free, but I was at Jewel and knew it would be a challenge - luckily Annie's to the rescue! Chocolate graham crackers shaped like bunnies! How could I lose? (I could not.) I barely altered the recipe, the pure unadulterated version of which can be found here.

Ingredients:

- seven ounces of chocolate-graham cookies
- 1/2 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
- six tablespoons unsalted butter, cut into bits
- 1/4 cup sugar
- one tin of 14-oz sweetened condensed milk
- 1/4 cup fresh lemon juice
- the zest of one lemon
-  1/4 cup creme fraiche
- two 6 oz containers of raspberries (2 1/2 cups)

Now, here are the absurdly easy directions.

First, lightly grease your pie plate. I had more crust left over at the end, so I used mini tart tins to make two small pies. Nom. Do as you will.

Now. Bash up the cookies. Then pulverize the bashed up cookies in a food processor or, as I did, in your knock-off magic bullet. When you've got all of it turned into a fine dust, put it in a bowl and set aside.

Now, in a microwave safe bowl put the chocolate chips, the butter, and the sugar. Then, slowly in bursts, melt the mixture - stir repeatedly until it blends together. Pour this into the blended up cookies and stir it up. Once combined, lightly press the crust into the pie pan and then put it in the freezer while you work on the rest of the pie. This is so it sets.

Now, in a mixing bowl, mix together the grated lemon peel, the lemon juice, the creme fraiche, and the sweetened condensed milk until combined. Add in the raspberries and stir, being sure to smoosh them up with a spoon so that the pie filling is pink and the berries are in bits.

The original recipe has you use half the raspberries in the filling and then you scatter the rest over the pie. Feel free to do this.

Now, remove the pie crust from the freezer (I had in there about a half hour or so , because I am easily distracted) and pour in the filling. You'll want it to set properly, which is a suggested time of two hour. Mine was still a bit runny after that time (although delicious), so I let it go overnight. But maybe pop it in the freezer to speed it up. Or, of course, just a few hours are needed. I'm not sure.

Either way, this is delicious. The lemon gives it a wonderful ZING.

Balsamic-Roasted Red Pepper Sauce with Shrimp and Chicken

 The aforementioned balsamic-roasted red pepper sauce with chicken and shrimp, 

garlic couscous, and a spinach salad with a cranberry-balsamic vinaigrette.

In January, I was given a free ticket to go visit my fantastic friend Michael in St. Paul, Minnesota. I've never been there, hadn't seen him in aaaaages, and was super excited. As always, it was a fantastic couple of days of mocking each other, watching ridiculous movies, and going on exciting thrift store hunts. Micheal's prize-find was a couch for his office, super cheap! Mine was a pair raspberry Doc Martins, also for super cheap. We were pleased.

Pleased and hungry.

Now, we ate out once and had pizza another night. But! I also made pumpkin-ginger cupcakes (which I NEED to post on here, they are my most requested cupcakes, and he had informed me from the first time I said I was visiting that I would, in fact, be making them) and Michael made a balsamic roasted red pepper sauce for some chicken.

Holy deliciousness, Batman. I demanded the recipe.

Then, promptly, I altered it. Because that's what you do. He did it too! It's the delicious way.

Seriously, nom. Make lots of variations. It was originally based on a recipe from About.com for Spicy Cornish Hens. I do quite a lot of variation, as you can see. It is spicy, it has some sweetness to it, and it goes deliciously with chicken and/or shrimp. I also like to add couscous as a grain. I prefer them to be whole wheat, but it is up to you.

My Ingredients!

- 10 oz roasted red peppers (I have also done roasted red-and-yellow peppers)
- 3 tablespoons seedless, all-natural, blackberry jam
 - 2 teaspoons French mustard
- 1 tablespoon olive oil
- 2/3 teaspoon rosemary
- 2 -3 tablespoons balsamic vinegar
- dash sea salt
- 1/4 teaspoon cayenne (or less or more, depending on how spicy you would prefer)

Put all the ingredients in a food processor/blender/silver-bullet style zoom-machine. Whizz until smooth, taste, and adjust seasonings as you prefer.

On the stove, have a deep skillet and spray a non-fat cooking spray (actual oil would also work...) and cook your protein and/or veg. When partially cooked, pour sauce over it and let finish cooking - the sauce will reduce somewhat.

Enjoy with a glass of wine! 

Or any beverage. Or none, but this is a chance to get your eight glasses of water a day. 

No joke, this smells and tastes amazing. It has received rave reviews and I can not encourage you enough to try this. Lock it down - it's delicious.

Chicken Fried Pork Chop

 BEHOLD.

A fantastic work of choppery.
Less greasy than it looks, sorry, this was fresh from the oil.

Confession Time: I've never chicken fried anything and, honestly, I'm not sure I'd ever even cooked a pork chop. But it was New Year's and very nice looking, no bone involved, chops were on sale for $1.66! How could I not?

This left me vs pork chops on New Year's Day and, while I knew I wanted a potato/rutabega mashed deliciousness and a peas/mushrooms/red cabbage veggie dish, I didn't know what I wanted to do with the chop. I debated Jamie Olivering my way though it when I found this recipe for Chicken Fried Pork Chops from Rock Recipes (god, I love foodgawker), did some minor tinkering, and dove right in. When I next do this - and there will be a next doing of this - I have some more plans for it, but thought a basic update would be helpful.

Without further ado...

You will need:
- 2 pork chops
- 1/2 cup flour
- 1/2 TSP sea salt
- 1 TSP pepper
- 1/2 TBS nutmeg
- 1 TSP basil
- 1/2 TSP paprika
- dash of cayenne pepper

You'll want to shift all the dry ingredients together in a shallow bowl that is large enough for you to put a pork chop in.

In another bowl, also large enough a chop to be dipped in, you'll want to mix up one egg and 2 TBS water.

Have a frying pan with about a half inch of canola oil in it ready on a medium heat. Not too hot. You don't want like crazy danger zone oil going on here.

Now. Dip your chop in the flour mixture on both sides, then in the egg wash on both sides, and then back in the flour mixture (yes, on all the sides). Fry it in the pan for about 6 minutes on each side, until it is done in the center. You may require a couple more minutes, but I didn't.


Let it rest for a minute so it can cool down and get all...rested.

The final plating.

I killed this. So, so hard.

Celebrate your genius. Devour. Offer a bite to your roommate, if you'd like. Or just make more chops.

Nutella Pinwheel Cookies

 A small bite of awesome. With milk, bein sur.

And yes, those are pink, sparkly nails. 

One of the best things about this time of year is that I can bake and bake and bake and nobody is going to say anything about it. Because a) it's hard to complain when your mouth is full of food and b) of course I'm cooking! It's Christimas!

That said, I thought this year I'd occasionally practice some new cookies and such before the massive Bake-a-Thon that heralds the holiday. When I have to go to Target and stock up on those stupid-cute gift bags/boxes/tins, when I burn myself with melted chocolate at least twice, when I have to drink through a failed baking attempt (last year - gingerbread house, year before - a complicated yule log experiment that involved a mousse that involved a packet of gelatin, a first for me, year before before, gingerbread. it melted.) Anyway, I have a handle on gingerbread now. And I do not yet know what baking attempt will blow up in my face at, probably, an ungodly time of night.

Look forward to that post, I'm telling you.
Be glad you don't live with me?

I stumbled across this recipe at The Galley Gourmet and love love loved it. What's not to enjoy? Nutella? Delicious. In cookie form? Fantastic. Super easy? Even better!

This recipe is a good reason to put "rolling pin" on the list of things I want for my kitchen, but I'll get to that and, really, you can find ways around it. Luckily, I was visiting a friend and she had a rolling pin and LO these cookies were whipped up. The recipe is fantastically simple - I halved it to see if I liked it and it worked swimmingly. You might want to make the whole batch though - they go awful fast.

I'm giving the whole recipe, in it's original form, but I used salted butter rather than unsalted and just a pinch of salt additionally and was no worse for wear.

Nutella Pinwheel Cookies

- 8 oz butter
- 1 cup sugar
- 2 egg yolks (I used large, she had extra large, but things seemed fine)
- 2 TSP vanilla
- 2 1/3 cup flour
- 1/4 TSP salt (she calls for kosher)
- 1/2 cup Nutella, divided

Now, I did veer a bit from her instructions, but I'm giving you mine rather than hers. They are virtually identical and if you'd like to mix up the flour/salt before hand and then add later, that's fine. I just didn't bother.

You'll want to cream the butter and sugar together, which doesn't take long and is - as always - delicious because, well, it's butter and sugar. Hard to fail. Add in the egg yolks and the vanilla and then mix up for a minute, until it's combined. Slowly add the flour and salt, until it forms a soft dough.

Transfer the dough to a lightly floured surface and separate into two halves. Form each half into a square, wrap up in plastic wrap, and put it in the fridge for about 30 minutes.

Now. Amuse yourself somehow. We gossiped and watched some Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

Take out one of the squares of dough and place on a lightly floured surface. Have the top covered in the plastic wrap and proceed to roll the dough out into a rectangle about a quarter inch thick. Remove the plastic wrap and spread half of the nutella over it, evenly. Leave about a 1/4 inch on the edges. Roll up the nutella spread cookie dough (god, those are good words to type) into a log and wrap up with plastic wrap (or parchment paper), then pop it into the freezer for about fifteen minutes.

Repeat with the second square of dough.

Preheat the oven to 350 F. You can either butter your cookie sheet, place some baking parchment down on it, place some foil on it, or use a sil-pat. I used a sil-pat. Consequently, I now really want a sil-pat as well as a rolling pin. Go figure.

 Go ahead. Eat one already. 

You deserve it.

Now. Remove a log of cookie dough from the freezer and unwrap it. Slice into 1/3" slices and place on the baking sheet, an inch or so apart. Bake for 12 to 15 minutes or until the cookies are olden around the edges. Cool on a wire rack and store in an air-tight container for up to a week.

Or eat in one sitting, either way. Delicious!

This recipe will make four dozen cookies, so, share and share alike!

Garlic Basil Foccacia

 Toasty brown and deliciously crisp.

Not Jewel's foccacia.

"What are you doing today?"
"Oh, I was thinking of making this foccia."
"Yes. Yes, you were."

A good friend of mine was in town recently and we had this sleepy conversation in the early afternoon hours when I was sprawled (and dressed, go me) in bed and he was freshly awoken. I was musing theoretical about ways to spend my day off and we ended up going to get coffee at a nearby coffee shop I'd not been to, but accurately guessed to be the right place to take him, and spent about a zillion hours at Reckless Records (where I found some cheap VHS tapes we needed, he found some albums he needed, and all in all good times were had) and then braved the rains to get home again. Where I tackled this recipe.

Everyone loved it. Most especially, it seemed, the boys. I was pleased because I'm always proud of a positive yeast-bread experience and this one, even with the corners I ended up cutting (just ten minutes! but they were likely meaningful.) was delicious. I even used some of it to make a grilled sammich and that's pretty much the height of living.

My recipe was taken (and based) from the blog So Tasty, So Yummy - it was splendid! Follow that link for the recipe.

The changes I made were to use canola oil instead of olive (we had more. but it was fine.) and instead of rosemary, I used a generous sprinkling of basil. I also used a Portuguese Salt Cream instead of table salt. It's pretty much like sea salt, it's pretty much outstanding.

I also, although this matters less, did not use a mixer - just the good ol' spoon and hand kneading trick.

I hope you love this bread as much as we did! (the whole thing did not last the evening!)

Retro-licious.

Come to mama, sweet delicious baby. 

'Cause Mama wants to devour you. 

Now, I'm a fan of vintage - which is not rare or special, but merely true, and you might know that about me if you've ever heard me gush over my 1950's cookbooks or my amazing vintage finds or Mad Men or any number of things. Especially if you've ever heard me bitch about how my hands are waaaay too big for cute gloves I find at places like Lenny's. I never really hunt for vintage dishes, with few exceptions, but would love to find adorable avocado dishes because - while I've always loved me some 'cado - I have recently discovered putting something in your half? EVEN BETTER.

This time, I went super Betty Draper on it and made a light, refreshing crab salad then heaped that on top of my perfectly ripe avocado. Then died happy.

Because, friends, let's face it. Maybe it isn't crazy hot where you are, but until today? Chicago has been pretty high on humidity and anger-inducing heat. Not a lot has really stepped in to save the day on that front. You want something to eat, but you want it to be easy and not millionty-degree-kitchen-making. (which is why I made pork roast last week, ha ha, naturally)

This is fantastically simple. Now, I had crab to start with 'cause of a wicked awesome sale at Jewel, but I imagine you could put a lot of things in an avocado and be happy.

 I'll say it loud and proud:

Delicious! 

But will not keep the tequila from getting you. Maybe Gloria should've sung about THAT.

Ingredients

- half cup of crab meat (or however much you would like, depending), shredded
- haf a lime
- salt, pepper
- half a small onion, chopped very fine (I used a yellow one 'cause I had it, but red would probably be even better)
- a stalk of celery, chopped very fine
- maybe a bell pepper or something, again, dice this finely, I didn't have this. So really any veg you'd like.
- avocado, halved

Mix your onion, crab, celery, salt and pepper together. Mix in any veg that you are using. Squeeze the lime half over it and mix more. You could let it sit for a few (let's say ten) minutes or so to let everything really come together but if you're being impatient, like I was, it won't kill you.

Cut your avocado in half and then remove the pit. Use the knife to seperate the avocado meat from the skin and place on a plate, then scoop some of the crab salad into the space where the pit used to be. If you'd like to make it larger, just spoon out some of the avocado meat.

It's really weird to say "avocado meat", you guys. Seriously.

Now. You've got your salad in your avocado and you can feel super retro and fancy. This would make a fantastic first course, a great light lunch/dinner, a snack, etc.

Naturally, you can add mayo if you want. I just found that I prefered mine without. And for you healthy people, avocados are supposed to be a healthy fat. Exxxcellent.

Super Delicious Hamburgers!

 Damn, Americana.

You know, I've never before thought my hamburgers weren't delicious, even when I made them only with ground beef (and we're talking the very cheapest packet at Jewel, here) and whatever seasoning I want to try. I thought that adding a bit of butter to the center was an amazing idea and was thrilled with it. Even more exciting was the bit of butter and cheese addition to the center. Then I did what I presume many others did and experimented further, using a Jamie Oliver (yes! Food Revolution strikes again!) recipe and was pretty delighted. On the one hand - I'd go back to my simple "smack ground beef together and cook" method and be okay, but...then again...my roommate freaked out over it. And it was damn good.

They even freeze and reheat well!

So, use whatever bread or condiments you like and be delighted. I don't particularly like pickles, but others do, and I had guests the night I made this so I managed to find corn-free pickle slices (harder than you think) and a tomato and spinach (which I like more than lettuce, mostly, but I should suck it up and buy the lettuce because today I actually did want it and...you don't need to know all of that, I'm sure) and an onion and mushrooms (both of which I cooked in a bit of basily-butter) and mayo and this cranberry-mustard I picked up at Stanley's. Delicious, even though I never use mustard except in recipes. And buns! I almost never get buns. It's hard enough buying bread with my allergy, bothering to go onto buns is almost not worth it.

UNTIL IT IS.

Anyway. The method of making these burgers is much like making these is a lot like making the meatballs I showed you recently. So you'll need...and should have, if you made meatballs...

MAKES SIX

- twelve saltines
- eight sprigs of parsley (finely chopped) OR a few good shakes, if dried
- two heaped TSP honey-dijon mustard
- one lbs ground beef
- one egg
- salt, pepper, other seasonings, etc (I used cumin)
- olive oil
- butter

Smash up the crackers and mix with the parsley, mustard, and ground beef. Add the egg and some salt and pepper and any other seasonings you may desire - I used cumin. Cumin tastes amazing here. Mix everything together quite well and then divide into six and pat each bit into your burger shape - about 3/4 inch thick. I like to put a sliver of butter in the center of my burgers, I find it adds deliciousness and moisture.

Drizzle the burgers with a bit of oil and pop them in the fridge until needed.

Preheat a frying pan (or a grill pan) for about four minutes on a high setting. Then turn the heat down to medium, place the burgers on the pan, and press lightly down on them with your spatula. Cook them to your liking at three or four minutes a-side. Or grill them.

Remember - if the eaters in question are kids or pregnant or sick or something, you'll want to cook them well-done. That's no pink in the middle. If you like it less so well done (I'm a medium girl myself, I like a bit of pink) then have at. You'll be the one sick, after all, if you don't cook it through enough. Not me.

Prepare all your trimmings as you like them, and serve.

If you have extra burgers, wrap them up in plastic wrap (or waxed paper, or whatever) and pop them into the feezer in a secured fashion.

This was my Fourth of July main course, but clearly this is amazing for any time.

Blackbird Blackberry Pie

 A completely delightful and delicious pie. 

That you totally want there to be four--and-twenty of.

Well, that's what Heather called it.

But it is made of blackberries and it is delicious and a pie and has a pie-bird in it. So she isn't wrong, but Heather's a bright girl, so of course she isn't wrong. She's awesome. So is this pie. It's delicious! And she thinks so too. So you should agree with her, 'cause my Heatherleh knows from deliciousness.

I basically wanted a pie on the Fourth of July. I didn't know it was the last day I'd feel not sick for over a week (I say over, 'cause I'm still not at peak form, in a few troubling ways, but I'm not as sick as I was two days ago, so YAY that's awesome) and so, despite the heat and my utter and complete laziness - which happens on any day I have off that I shouldn't - I dragged myself to the a nearby grocery store along with the rest of the freaking area.

I did manage, stunningly, to get a self-checkout pretty quickly. I can't even do that on emptier times.

This pie is simple. If you have a favorite crust recipe, please use it! Or a pre-made crust. It's fine. Mine is simple - I just mix a stick of softened butter with around a cup and a half of flour, a dash of salt, and a half cup of sugar. If it is too crumbly, I mix in two TBS of ice water. Then I ball it up, flatten in it plastic wrap, and chill it for about a half hour.

Divide in half. Roll it out, place it on the bottom of your buttered pie pan. OR press it in the bottom of a buttered pie pan if, like me, you a) don't have a rolling pin and aren't in the mood to clean off a bottle or something and b) the dough is soft enough that making bits of dough flat in the bottom of the pan makes sense.

Put the other half back in the fridge.

Take

- two packets of blackberries (or raspberries or blueberries), rinsed with bad ones removed
- 1/4 cup sugar
- two TSP vanilla

and mix together in a bowl. If you aren't in any great hurry, let that sit for about fifteen minutes to a half hour, but never mind if you don't - I rarely do and it's never bothered anything. Pour the mixture into your pie crust.

If you have a pie bird, put in in the center.

Roll out the other half of the dough and place around the pie-bird or, much as before, flatten out and put the dough on top the pie around the pie-bird by hand. It'll look rougher, but that's okay. It's rustic! Sprinkle the crust with sugar, barely.

 Looks pretty tasty, if you ask me. 

And you sort of it, by reading this blog.

If you did NOT use a pie-bird, then cut some slits in the crust or designs or something. It'll let the steam escape. If you have it, you still can if you want to, but you needn't.

Bake at 375 F for approx 35 mins, until the crust is golden. Let sit and cool, so the pie can gel.

Slice and serve with whipped cream or ice cream or by itself. Be delighted!

OPTIONAL: You can buy tapioca and mix some of it in with the berries, if you want more of a fruit-gel around your fruit.

Crunchy Garlic Chicken or Why I Love Jamie Oliver

 Dear god. 

Lock. It. Down.

I don't want to exaggerate anything, but oh my god I completely love Jamie Oliver. The man is amazing and seems like the sweetest guy. I will genuinely be crushed if there is any scandal about him - but I will still love his food. (also, there will never be any scandal, he is a peach). If I could meet any one chef, I'd want to meet him. Of course, if I could meet any handful of chefs, that'd be even better.

Basically, as much as I detest Bobby Flay, King of Tools, I love Jamie Oliver. That, my friends, is saying something as I have broken into the conversations of strangers when Flay is mentioned.

In Jamie's Food Revolution there is a recipe for Crunchy Garlic Chicken. I can not sing the praises of this recipe enough, seriously, I died. DIED. Then came back to eat more because this is so amazing. If you aren't new to the blog, then you'll know about my quest for the perfect chicken strips. I've found them in panko, yes, but this might actually blow that out of the water. At the first go, I'm going to go ahead and say that - yes, once again - this is a Lock It Down recipe. I made a few minor changes to the original recipe, but essentially let it be.

I suggest serving this with a salad or some simple veggies, but if you'd like to go for full-blown comfort then try some mashed potatoes (to make it healthier, make it a mashed cauliflower or cauliflower-potato blend). Jamie suggests using a cream cracker, such as Jacob's, but my Jewel doesn't carry them and I didn't really feel like hunting them down. Anyway, he'd said the same thing for the meatballs, and saltines were pretty much the bomb in that.

Without further ado...

Crunchy Garlic Chicken

INGREDIENTS

- two cloves of garlic
- seven to eight saltines
- two TBS butter
- a few shakes of parsley (or four fresh sprigs)
- salt and pepper
- two TBS flour
- one egg
- two boneless, skinless chicken breasts
- olive oil
- the zest of one lemon OR Garlic-Lemon Trinidad Seasoning
- OPTIONAL -Orange-Pepper (a fantastic change from lemon pepper, if you use this nix on the black pepper above)

WHAT TO DO

Peel the garlic and zest the lemon. If you have a food processor, zoom the crackers with the butter, garlic, parsley, lemon zest, and salt/pepper. You'll want to make the mixture very fine, then pour the crumbs on a plate. If you do NOT have a food processor (clearly, I do not) then mince the garlic very, very finely. Bash the crackers up and mix with the parsley, lemon zest, pepper, garlic, and salt. The butter should be softened and then stir it in with crumb mixture. Put that on a plate.

Helloooooo, crumbs.

Sprinkle the flour onto a second plate. Be thankful that you have so many saucers in your ramshackle apartment.

Beat the egg in a small bowl with a fork.

Cut the fatty bits out of the chicken. If you want more of a strip type of thing, cut them into strips. I cut my chicken breasts in half to make them thin, then lightly score the bottom of the chicken breasts. Smack them with a pan a few times (in plastic wrap, of course) to flatten them out a bit - unless, of course, you already cut them in half because it's a little late and maybe you don't want to whack things.

Dip the chicken in the flour, getting it totally coated, then dip it into the egg, then coat with the flavored crumbs. Pat the crumbs onto the chicken so it sticks.

sizzle sizzle sizzle

"Oh, that delicious smell? It's nothing...but awesomeness."

I fried mine in some olive oil for about five minutes on each side, until cooked through and delightfully golden and crisp. You can also bake them, however. Preheat your oven until it is hot as blazes (475 F yikes!) and put your chicken on a cookie sheet and bake for about fifteen minutes.

Now. You can serve them whole as they are, cut them up into strips or bits or whatever you like. Squeeze a bit of lemon on them if you'd like. Serve with the sides of your choosing. Swoon.

Poor picture, unbelievable food.

The only flaw in this is keeping the breading crisp for the next day, I chucked some in a plastic container and it didn't really keep up. It was still delicious, though. Really, I think this is much more meant to be eaten the night of, which will be fantastically easy as this stuff is killer.

 A crisp, light, veggie laden salad.

Come to mama.

I realize it might not always look like it on here, but I actually do really love a good salad. I eat my veg regularly and enjoy a lovely salad lunch as much as anyone else. Do I tend to order salad as my meal out with people? No, not usually. But I do really enjoy a nice, tasty salad as a meal or a side.

I made a most delicious salad the other day, is my point. Truly delightful. A handful of spinach, a cut up avocado half, a cut up tomato, some cucumber, a scattering of cheese, a few sliced radishes, and a lovely balsamic vinegarette.

It's actually the vinegarette I'm here to share with you.

I used a ratio of three parts extra-virgin olive oil to one part balsamic vinegar. My olive oil this time was infused with lemon. I added a dash of salt (and one I get sea salt OH MAN LIFE WILL BE AWESOME) and some pepper.

Drizzle on the salad, toss so all the leaves get covered. You don't need a lot, I'm not a drowner. Enjoy!

Chicken ala King. Should that be Dethroned King?

Mmmm...creamy, peppery, chickeny goodness!

Takes me back, oh yes indeed.

I have a pretty strong memory of the first time I ever ate this dish. Or, anyway, the first time I remember eating it. I was both annoyed and baffled by this not-at-all-a-potpie that my dad had whipped up. I'm sure there were loads of veggies and I'm pretty sure he made drop biscuits. I remember standing in the kitchen and being somehow very confused by the whole sequence of events. I liked it. I did not daydream about it. I was Team Potpie.

Since then, of course, I've really enjoyed the goodness that is chicken ala king. It's just so pleasing and warming! I still tend to make potpie as my creamy-chickeny vehicle (or a pasta) but the other day, I really could just not get this out of my mind. I wanted it. I craved it. I was having A Very Bad Day and I knew this would make everything better.

I swung by Jewel, gathered maybe three or four items, came home and ate some pasta that my roommate had made and went to sleep.

THE END. IT IS SO EXCITING.

Actually, that is how the night went, but the next day I embarked on a huge bake-a-thon and this was my dinner afterwards. Chicken ala Dethroned King. Dethroned because, well, I was broke and the lack of bell peppers and peas and everything clues you in on that. I also took the easy way out and used insta-biscuits from a can.

Still. It was delicious.

- two chicken breasts, cut up into bite-size bits (you can also steam or poach or whichen and shred it)
- four carrots, sliced
- handful of mushrooms, sliced
- splash of white wine
- garlic, minced
- onion, chopped
- paprika, salt, pepper, basil
- one cup heavy cream
- half cup chicken broth
(more or less as desired or needed, I'm pretty sure these were my measurements)
- approx. a tablespoon of tapioca starch to thicken the sauce

Boozey veg! My favorite.

 Now, what you want to do is cook the chicken in some olive oil and butter - unless, of course, you've steamed or poached it. Season with pepper and basil and salt. Add in the onion, garlic, and veg. Splash in some white wine and let cook down. Season to taste, then add the chicken broth and the cream (or half and half or even milk!). After about ten minutes, sprinkle in the starch while stirring swiftly the whole time. Go slowly until you've reached the desired thickness. Season with paprika and any additional flavors you may want.


Serve on a biscuit! May I suggest cheese? :) 

Taquitos!

I'm not even kidding.

This is the only picture I was able to take, so it is by default the best.

I apologize. Picture something delicious.

THERE. That is now "how tasty my taquitos are". 

Effortless would almost be the word best used to describe this recipe, except for the fact that I accidentally left the broiler on and burnt up my first batch. This did not stop anyone from devouring them, though, which I took as a note of confidence as I made sure to guard over the next batch.

Um, about the broiler. It's how we pre-heat our oven. It isn't even on the list of things to fix about this place - rather, "awesome oven" is on the list for Things For Next Apartment. If I told you what else was on that list, you'd shake your heads, so instead I'll say: if you, too, have an oven like this - wanna start a support group?

Anyway.

I made these easy taquitos! There were both chicken and vegetarian (black refried beans, with extra veg) options. So simple. See how easy?

Ingredients:

- flour tortillas
- two chicken breasts
- one can of vegetarian refried black beans
- four cloves garlic
- diced onion
- diced tomato
- diced bell pepper
- salsa
- sour cream
- guacamole
- basil, salt, pepper, etc etc
- olive oil
- shredded cheese

You'll want to steam the chicken, so shake some basil, salt, and pepper over the breasts and then steam away. While your kitchen starts to smell amazing, heat up the beans in a pan, using a bit of oil, about half the garlic, and season as you wish. You'll just be cooking it up a bit so it is hot.

Shred the cooked-through chicken. Add garlic, a little salsa (a few tbs), some of the onion, and anything else you'd like. Now. Take a tortilla. Rub a little oil onto each side and then, fill the inside with some shredded chicken mixture and cheese. Roll up tightly then place in a baking dish (or on a cookie sheet). Repeat.

For the vegetarian ones, you'll want to put the bean mixture in the inside, with some onion and tomato and cheese, then roll up.

Bake for fifteen minutes at 350 F, or until the tops are crisp and golden-brown and the insides are hot and melty. If you want to broil briefly at the end to get a golden-brownier top, please do.

Serve with sour cream, guacamole, salsa, and anything else you want. I imagine that "serve" usually involves plates.

Ours didn't make it farther from the baking dish than our mouths. OH THE LIFE.

The Eggs Have It. It being a potpie.

 Oh, but don't I love me some panko.

 

I know what time it is and that time is Posting Time! Or two in the morning, take your pick. My primary reasons for posting right now: I am awake and while Lyra would prefer that I were sleeping (or so I would gather from watching her sprawl endearing on the bed and stare me down with half-shut eyes), it's a little toasty in here and part of that is the weather and part of that is the fact that I feel like I'm running a slight fever?

I started to say "baby fever" but then realized that may send the wrong message. Which I don't want to do.

Also, I just wrote and deleted a description of some amazing thrift store finds. Maybe I should add a partner blog to this that talks about my actual life-life. I'm not boring, just ask my therapist (ba DUM bum).

Would anyone be interested in that?

H-hello? (is it me you're looking for...?) 

On to the food! Which is why you are here, I presume. That and my sparkling wit. 

One of my cookbooks is Elinor Klivans' Potpies: Yumminess in a Dish. No, I know, it isn't the best title, but so many cookbooks fall prey to the fact that they don't have the best names.

For those interested. My cat has just climbed under my (new! well. new to me! my roommate sourced this from his home in the 'burbs, bless.) bed and is likely going to climb into the box spring BECAUSE SHE IS INSANE.

Back to Elinor! She also wrote a book about cupcakes, which I also own, and is full of delicious ideas. Now, I love me a potpie and while I have made several from this particular cookbook, I've managed to perfect my own person chicken (or veg!) potpie by this point and so use this for the less traditional ideas. One thing I have always meant to cook from this dish is the Comfort-Me-with-Eggs potpie.

The story she has about it says she was served this in Ohio (represent!) by the Overbey family. I thought her recipe seemed...more basic than I would have preferred, so I took the idea and ran with it. Because you know what? When I made this (the day after Easter) I genuinely needed a comfort dish.

April Fools Day is, apparently, still an excuse for people to break out their inner Mean Girls.

SO. Eggs! Plenty of hardboiled eggs lying around, it had just been Easter! Only one thing to do!

 Oh look! Brightly colored eggs!

Kitchenry's Comfort Me With Eggs Potpie (with major kudos to Ms. Klivans and, apparently, the Overbey's.)

Ingredients

- eight hardboiled eggs
- two cups milk
- butter! about two tablespoons
- one half of an onion, diced the hell up.
- a handful of mushrooms, sliced
- garlic, minced to minceytown. (I used three cloves.)
- 2-3 TBS of flour
- dash of salt
- pepper (or even lemon-pepper. god I love lemon-pepper.)
- basil (as much as you want!)
- paprika (a pinch)

ALSO

- panko! the original recipe suggests 1 1/4 cups, honestly I just put a nice amount in a bowl.
- 2 TSP paprika
- 3 TBS melted butter
- pinch of salt

THEN

Preheat the oven to 375 F.

Peel your hardboiled eggs, then cut them in half and place them in the baking dish. I used my pleasing green dish, the original recipe suggests a six cup baking dish. I was fine. You can lay the eggs atop each other if you need, it's fine.

 Chopped and beautiful. 

Although at this point, I was a little like "what. are. you. DOING?"

In a saucepan, heat the milk over medium heat until it is hot and steam starts to rise, but don't boil it. Turn off the heat and ignore while you continue.

In another saucepan, melt the butter with the onion and mushrooms for around two minutes. Season with basil. Stir in the flour and cook a bit (or you can, um, forget this part until you've already added the hot milk and then add it but this way is easier. trust me.) for another couple of minutes, then slowly pour the hot milk over it while wisking away like a devil. Season with some salt and pepper and the pinch paprika and any other seasons you'd like. Let thicken, which will take about two or three minutes, and then pour the sauce over the eggs in the baking dish.

Even in non-traditional potpies, the creamy delicious sauce is the turning point. 

It's like a promise to be delicious and comforting.

And a reminder that maybe you should eat a salad or go to the gym.

Y'know.

Now. Mix the panko, paprika, melted butter, dash salt, and any other seasoning if using in a dish to moisten all crumbs. Spoon over the filling and spread it out evenly.

Bake around a half hour, until the top is a deep golden color and it's all bubbly and delicious. Then serve the hell out this.

I'm thinking of adding cheese to the crust next time, since when I reheated mine I added cheese to the dish and died. Seriously, so tasty.

And you know what? Comforting. Which is the whole point of a potpie. 

Homemade Potato Chips or Lazy McLazerson Can Still Impress You

I

Look at that! Chips! 

Ignore my thumb and the fact that I am clearly holding this up in a place not meant for food-tography.

You'll forgive me, won't you? 

Potato chips.

Not healthy, but delicious. I usually eat pita chips or sesame sticks when I want crunchy snacks. I've baked garbonzo beans in the oven. Enjoyed random delicious things from the Asian grocery store I frequent. From time to time, there are other things, but rarely are these things chips.

Inexplicable, then, how I should really really want some the other night. Luckily, my father had told me a while ago (and then, of course, blogged about it)  about how to make your own chips in - no, no, wait for it - a microwave. Of all things! The ol' microwave! The cheese-melter! The heater-upper! The friend of all college students! This is not to say that  I do not use the microwave, 'cause god knows I do. This is to say that I do not often put uncooked things in it and then later, blog about it.

Hell, I'm skeptical of microwave cake. I like to reheat things in it. On the rare occasion where frozen food exists in my life, I like to use it to turn it into non-frozen food when the oven is not available.

And when is the oven not available?

Rarely. That's when. RARELY.

Anyway. I was skeptical but also figured it was healthier than frying and less time consuming than baking and, well, I was just frying my panko-chicken up in a bit of butter. I hardly needed to wait for my (admittedly finicky) oven to heat up and then make me some chips.

So I did it. I nuked the thin potato slices, the thicker potato slices. And when all was said and done?

THAT SHIT WAS DELICIOUS.

Who knew?

Here is how I did it.

Ingredients:
- a potato
- any seasoning you like

Instructions:

You want to slice the potato in whatever thickness you desire. I suggest thinner ones, but then again maybe you fancy kettle style chips. I like the thick ones too. I get it.

Put the potato slices on a microwave safe (and I mean, really, a microwave safe) plate. Thick in the middle, thin on the edges. Sprinkle with whichever seasonings you like - I did some salt & pepper ones, a few spicier ones, and then just played a bit with some of my Spice House blends. Do whatever you like. One was barely - and I do mean barely - touched with olive oil.

The others weren't oiled at all.

Set your plate in the microwave and nuke for five minutes. You might need more, but I doubt you need less unless they are all really thin or, you know, you like it like that. Feel free to check at around four.

Ideally, the chip has gotten brown spots and crisped up. Most of them popped right off the plate, but even the ones that were a little reluctant came up without any problems.

And I took a bite...

and it crunched! And it tasted good.

Belated apologies for the awful awful plating in that photo. I meant to do it nicely and then got all hungry and then had eaten most of them before I mumbled to my cat "oh, right, the blog!" and then snapped the snap and went back to stuffing my maw.

I know you read this for the depictions of my delicate life. I am, after all, a lady.

A lady with an early appointment who must go to bed.